I love so very much that you want to sleep on me. I love even more that you are considerate enough to not try to sleep too close to Siada, because I do not need a nocturnal brawl on top of me. I do wish, however, that you would consider some other location that is not my throat. You are far too big now to drape safely across my windpipe.
I hope that you will take this into consideration if you want me to continue living long enough to feed you each morning.
Your favorite person
PS - I dont need your extra fluffy tail up my nose either.
Sweetheart, please give me warning the next time you decide to have the BEST DAY EVER and to try to make the leap onto the top shelf of the closet, while I am sitting on the floor under it looking for something. Your epic miss, and desperate attempt to save yourself, brought down the entire top shelf of winter clothes onto my head.
This was not my best Monday ever.
BEST MAMMA EVER
I think you need to go visit the sorting hat again. I am pretty sure you are a Slytherin.
The concerned Ravenclaw in your house
Savannah Caretaker who is honored to do the job.